Makes you like your eggs on the Jersey side

Kit Fenderson-Peters

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Towards my better self
Recent events with my girlfriend and with [personal profile] ruisseau have led me to the conclusion that I need to actively work towards being a better person, rather than letting it happen semi-organically. In other words, I need to "walk my talk". So I thought I ought to define just what that "talk" is.

To begin with, I want to discuss scope. The following axioms and principles apply only to me and my interpersonal relationships with other adults capable of consent. They do not prescribe a larger (e.g. political) system, and they may not apply to anyone else. That being said:


"You made this bed, now lie in it" Actions have consequences, and whatever I do will come back to me in one way or another. I must be aware of this at all times.

"It seemed like a good idea at the time" I may at any time decide to violate any of the following principles. I must not do this without a damned good reason.

"Every [person] is a star" Every person, including me, is a sovereign being with their own inalienable rights, most importantly the right to choose how they live. I must not infringe upon those rights without the other's consent.

... And that's all I have so far, but there will be more to follow, I'm sure.

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the power of consent

"I must not infringe upon those rights without the other's consent."

I agree with your intent, but the phrasing has a problem for me:

If you have received informed consent freely given, it cannot be an infringement of their rights. My point being, way too many people live in guilt for "infringing" on others when they really haven't. It can even be a total pain for the person without being any kind of infringement.

Was it "infringing" on us when one of my covenmates arranged a schedule for folks to stay in my lady's room overnight during the last week of her life? I barely got any sleep the night I did, as she needed something every couple of hours. But my lord got some needed sleep and my lady got taken care of, and all I suffered was one day of bleariness at work. It was a pain but it was even more a privilege.

Re: the power of consent

I see your point. How about "I must obtain consent from another before taking any action that would involve them"? Certainly someone can inconvenience themselves or worse on my account if they so choose.

Re: the power of consent

I think I see what you're saying, but I like that the original restricted your infringement to those inalienable rights only. We 'involve' people in our lives all the time, and trying not to do so constantly seems unrealistic. But avoiding infringement of sovereignty is different somehow.

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